A Year of Thanks

bigstock-Gratitude-37954498This year has been hard, y’all. HARD. Sometimes I think that my Mom’s death took a scoop of my soul along with her. And then just over six months later, my husband (my caregiver, my best friend, my everything) had a stroke. So when I say this year has been hard, what I really mean is this year has been a journey through a dark, terrifying, life-changing, earth-shattering, health-destroying, nauseating, twisting tunnel that we do not quite see the end of yet. HARD.

And so it is time to give thanks.

I am grateful for everything my mother taught me, from how to read a scientific paper, to how to make meatloaf, to how to nurture others, to how to be a feminist.

I am grateful – so overwhelmingly grateful – that my husband is alive, still my caregiver, my best friend, my everything. I am grateful to the healthcare professionals who have helped him on his recovery, and grateful that we live near a city that has some of the best medical help available in the country.

I am grateful to our families and to our friends, both the old friends who have come through at every turn and the new friends who have shown up. And I am especially grateful to my friends whom I mostly know through the phone or email, but who are just as dear to me as the friend who can give us a ride to the ER on a Saturday afternoon.

I am grateful to my own body, for not collapsing under the weight of this year. Well done, body. I’m trying to take care of you. I am grateful to my own healthcare team for playing its role in keeping me going.

This week, especially, I don’t want to focus on HARD. I just want to treasure all the gratitude I can make space for in my life.

Thou knowest full well, O my God, that tribulations have showered upon me from all directions and that no one can dispel or transmute them except Thee. – The Bab

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8 Responses to A Year of Thanks

  1. rob wijbenga says:

    thankfulness must be one of the greatest gifts in existence, especially under such circumstances. Only mature souls are able to divert the negativity of the extreme darkness of the events of your last year into the positive energy of gratitude… thanks for sharing and gladdening and strengthening the heart of others as well

  2. Denise says:

    Thank you for your voice.

    Thank you for reminding me to make careful note of things I am thankful and grateful for so that I can fully treasure each of them.

  3. Patty Hirst says:

    I want to thank you for being a voice for so many, the strength and fortitude that you show is inspiring! Being grateful for the goodness in my life keeps me going, family and friends are priceless! Struggling with ME/CFS, and Fibromyalgia can be lonely at times, sometimes I wonder how I will make it through.. Love of family and friends helps me every day, I too have a wonderful husband,friend, partner that is here for me. There are no words for the grateful appreciation I hold for him. We have gone through thick and thin together for 40 years, him and my children are my rocks, and I don’t think I want to think about how different and difficult life would have been w/out them. Losing your Mom is so very hard – it takes a long time to learn to live without her. My condolences to you, I still feel the pain after eight years. It does get easier as time goes by, and you will remember her with love, and humour in my case! Take care and be happy for all the blessings in your life, I always know it could be worse! ?

  4. Maria says:

    My daughter has a chronic illness, and I wish i could live forever to be there for her.. I see both sides of your sorrow. I lost my mom died while I was having cancer treatment , it was hard. I keep her photo where I pass it every day, it helps.

  5. Homa Tav says:

    Your gratitude involves courage and continues to inspire me. I’m grateful for your steadfastness – and wit, courage, sense of humor/irony, fortitude, patience, feistiness, fury, determination and friendship. Keep living in gratitude – no matter how hard it will be.

  6. Asa says:

    Thank you, Jennie, for all the good you put into the world. You’re a beautiful soul and a blessing to so many. I wish you (and your family) peace, healing, and continued strength.

  7. And despite all of it, you still found your voice for so many, Jennie. You are a testament and an example of how to overcome, and how to let your light shine despite adversity. Thank you!

  8. Jan says:

    Beautifully said Jennie!

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